Monday 26 October 2009

Dating in London: Part 3: What not to do on a first date

I have been dating for nearly 2 decades, so I think I have some advice to share.
I have dated men from all over the world. I have shopped around like my Mamma told me. But, here in my quest of trying to find Mr. Darcy and kissing a lot of frogs I would like to share some advice for all the blokes and dudes out there on what not to do on the first initial date, which usually predict the success and ensures a second date.This is meant for men. Here's some advice for all the men out there.


Don't's for Guys:

1. Don't be too desperate to try to kiss her
or hold her hand- let things develop naturally.



Story: I was at my brother's wedding and an old boyfriend from 20 years
back was there. He tried very hard to kiss me and chased me all over the dance floor and through out this very elegant hotel my brother had his reception. It was really embarrassing for me. When I found out that he was going to be there I was excited and anticipated something romantic. But, he was so aggressive that he turned me off and made me realized he hadn't changed much from way back when we were in high school.


2.Dont' talk about the future with her. Don't try to create a relationship when there's none. Don't start to ask her if she's seeing other guys. Or, if she's waiting
for you. Or,if she'll have your children.If you are meeting with friends:don't imply to your other friends that you make a cute couple.


Story: I had a date I met through Craigslist and we were getting along and he mentioned to me that he wanted to buy property with me. He asked me how many children I wanted to have. I know you are trying not to waste time out there and your trying to find out as much about me as possible in as short of time as possible, but puuuuuuuuuuuuleeeeeeeeeeeeeze can you be a bit more subtle?


3.Dont' boss her around. It seems like a lot of men like to give advice, but it's unsolicited. Or men are really interested in material toys and so they want everyone to have the same toys as they have. This is great with another gal that's into material things but if she's not, you are gong to turn her off. I personally don't enjoy people to tell me what to do ,( unless it's my parents, family or a really good friend or maybe my future husband) which is why I run my own business and why I don't like to work for other people. Anyway, there are women that like to be bossed around, but I am not one of them. I don't think most intelligent, educated women enjoy being bossed around. So anyway, don't do it. It makes you seem a bit chauvanistic and wankeristic.


I dated a man once who was clever, funny,ambitious,charming but then he annoyed me. He annoyed me because he started telling me how I should buy a new camera. It really made me mad, because at the time I quite fancied my camera and secondly I didn't have the budget to buy a new camera. What if she doesn't want to buy a new camera or she can't afford to. Your advice will be resented. It's the first date, who are you to tell her what she needs to do.


4. Don't talk about anything remotely that has to do with sex
You want to get to know someone gradually. You don't want all the fire to burn out in the first date.Or do you?I am not sure, but men should just learn to control themselves.They'll go farther faster if they just don't act like such love sick high school boys.


Story: This man on our second date over drinks said that he liked porno and that he bought some movies yesterday.I was so utterly repelled,I excused myself to go to the powder room and never came back.



5.Don't talk about Kama Sutra and how you would like to try
out a new position with. This really shows a lack of taste and grace.
And, it makes the lady feel that your just out with her for one thing only. Even, if she has attraction for you, she'll be immediately turned off, unless
she's Samantha from Sex and The City.


Story: I really had a date once that half way through the date everything was perfect:he was really cute, charming and sweet.I thought we were getting on. And then he had to ruin it by asking me if I would like to try a Kama Sutra position. I was turned off and disappointed, especially since we had been having so much fun.The truth is I told my date how disappointing I was and he apologized and said that he was sorry that he hadn't had much experience dating.Fair Enough.He was very young so I cut him some slack. I felt really sorry for him and just changed the subject.



So, you see men with some advice from the opposite gender you'll begin to see the way women see things and perhaps it will open up a different world for you.Either way, it will give you some things to think about and ponder.



Stay Tuned for more
Look for More Dating DONTS for Men in coming SABRINA'S LONDON DIARIES

Shakespeare's Contribution to the English Language


William Shakespeare contributed more phrases and sayings to the English language than any other individual - and most of them are still in daily use. Every week, in my blog,I will be writing about one of the 135 phrases that he coined.



ALL THAT GLITTERS IS NOT GOLD.

Meaning: A showy article may not necessarily be valuable.

Origin: The original form of this phrase was 'all that glisters is not gold'. The 'glitters' version of the phrase long ago superseded the original and is now almost universally used.

Shakespeare is the best-known writer to have expressed this idea. The original Shakespeare editions of The Merchant of Venice, 1596, have the line as 'all that glisters is not gold'. 'Glister' is usually replaced by 'glitter' in renditions of the play:

MOROCCO:
O hell! what have we here?
A carrion Death, within whose empty eye
There is a written scroll! I'll read the writing.
All that glitters is not gold;
Often have you heard that told:
Many a man his life hath sold
But my outside to behold:
Gilded tombs do worms enfold.
Had you been as wise as bold,
Young in limbs, in judgment old,
Your answer had not been inscroll'd:
Fare you well; your suit is cold.


A VIDEO OF MERCHANT OF VENICE



MORE IN SABRINA'S LONDON DIARIES

- Harry Potter in London

- Fashion in London Part 2

-Dating in London: Part 3. How to Cause a Stir

Wednesday 21 October 2009

London Fashion Part 1

What is fashion? Is it all about keeping up with the trends or being a unique individual? To me fashion has to do with personal style, attitude, and charm. To me, you can wear a £2,000 Marc Jacob coat, but can you pull it off. Do you have the panache? do you have the attidude? Do you have the bearing to wear it or does it wear you? To me style is all about being yourself and trusting your instincts. It's being comfortable in your own shoes. It's about confidence. You can wear a £10 jacket you bought at the Charity shop and you can look like a million bucks if you have the confidence to wear it. Once, I bought a Cynthia Rowley Vintage jacket at The Salvation Army in Los Angeles;it was worth about $500, but I only spent $8.00.It was a steal!Everytime,I wear it I feel like a rock star.I get tons of compliments. In the end, do you want to be swallowed up by the fashion industry or do you want to make your mark in your own way?




Here are a some photos I gathered from seeing people walking in the streets
and admiring thier uniqueness and courage to follow thier own sense of style.
London Steet Style:A bright orange sweater bought at a charity shop,a green baseball cap worn with orange garden shoes,a khaki jacket with the only acessory a gorgeous smile,a nice fluffy scarf,butterfly belt worn with converse shoes. Are the 80's back?It's neon to die for! A beautiful Irish lassie wears sophisticated black in a sexy sweater and skinny black jeans. A fedora hat worn with bohemian tunic and leather purse. A bright purple shirt worn with head bandana, and converse shoes. Whatever it is, make it your own. Do whatever it is to express who you are and your uniqueness.Make it your style and no one elses!














 

 

 

 
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Monday 5 October 2009

Borough Market- The Oldest Market in London

When I first came to London I lived back in October 2008, I lived in Southwark at the St. Christopher's Hostel. Just 2 blocks down was the fun, eclectic and energetic Borough Market, which made it bearable to live in the loud hostel. It also helped me make up my mind where I was going to root myself in this great big daunting uknown city. I loved and still love going there on Saturday mornings just with a spirit of adventure trying to new foods,like Ostrich burgers or cassoulett. It's a favorite of Londoners on Saturday mornings. You can have hot apple cider from England's best Apple Farms. There are hundreds of vendors there selling everything from tortellini, truffle oil, to the most authentic Indian masala tea( you must shake your head back and forth). You may also just buy exotic fruits and veggies. I didn't think London would have exotic fruits and vegetables, but they do, some I have never tried. You can also sample Basque ham, foie gras, goose fat, confit, bouillabaisse, regional wines, chorizo, Arabic spices for a true Morroccan cous cous, Somerset jams, organic cheese, and tempting tantalizing artisanal bread. It's a Foodies heaven ! (Julia Child should have visited a few times, if she did. Speaking of Julia Child did anyone see the movie Julia and Julie?) The sad thing is I can't pack this food home back to the USA, but just live with the memory of savouring the gastronomic delights that is both a feast for the eye and the pallette.

But, what's so interesting about this market is that it's been around since the 13th century. Borough Market is London's oldest food market. It was established on the south bank of the Thames when the Romans built the first London Bridge. It has occupied its present site for 250 years. The romantic in me pretends I am in the renaissance times, in a big huge corsetted dress with a bustle (that my skullerymaid has taken 1 hour to help me tie up the laces) wandering about the Market trying to gracefully dance through the masses of people, smelling this bread, touching those apples as I fill my basket with the abundance of this great earth. Lovely !
















For hours and Location
http://www.boroughmarket.org.uk/

Etymology of Words: The Origin of P.O.S. H

A word that many Londoners or English use is the word posh. In British culture, something posh is elegant or stylishly luxurious; somebody or something typical of the upper class. " Posh" is an acronym for "Port Out, Starboard Home.

Here are some examples I have overheard in everyday speech where the word posh is used, abused and overused. I really wish people would vary their slang, it gets quite boring to hear that word posh used so liberally, without much rumination or deliberation.

Some Examples of using posh in a sentence:

1. I really don't like those ladies with their fake posh (prententiously aristrocratic) accents they sound like Madonna when she was the Queen of England.

2.Those girls with their posh (upper-class) accents really get on my tits
(they are annoying me)!!.

3.Sasha:" That is a really posh (expensive)handbag!"
Chloe: "Thanks darling, they only sell it at the very posh ( the very chic)Harrods."

4. I just ate at Claridges the most posh (elegantly) restaurant in Mayfair.

5. Lady Darlington: At that low brow garden party the host is so posh( stuck up), he didn't even kiss my hand when we were introduced.
Lord Fitzwilliam: Oh the nouveau riche are so posh (prentiously superior)(HA!)

So,what is the origin of the word posh?

The story goes that the more well-to-do passengers travelling to and from India used to have POSH written against their bookings, standing for 'Port Out, Starboard Home' (indicating the more desirable cabins, on the shady side of the ship). Unfortunately, this story did not make its appearance until the 1930s, when the term had been in use for some twenty years, and the word does not appear to have been recorded in the form The best known and most widely believed story is that it comes from old-time ship travel from Britain to India on the packet boats run by the Peninsular and Oriental Steamship Company. It supposedly stood for “Port Out, Starboard Home”. It is explained that somebody who had a cabin on the port side on the outward trip, and on the starboard side on the return trip, had the benefit of the sea breeze, and shelter from the sun, on the hottest part of the journey through the Suez Canal and the Red Sea. Such cabins were reserved for the most wealthy passengers, we are told, and the P&O company stamped their tickets with POSH to show their status. 'P.O.S.H.', which would be expected if it had originated as an abbreviation. Despite exhaustive enquiries by the late Mr George Chowdharay-Best, researcher for the OED, including interviews with former travellers and inspection of shipping company documents, no supporting evidence has been found.


MORE IN SABRINA'S LONDON DIARIES
- Harry Potter in London
- Fashion in London
-Dating in London: Part 3. How to Cause a Stir

The Etymology of Words: The meaning of DARLING

All the men living in the UK whether they are Pakistani, Indian, English, Scottish, Welsh, Irish, Egypitian, Iraqi, Spanish, Italian, Polish if they have lived here in London long enough they acquire this charming habit of calling everyone darling. I like it, it has a nice sing song and is very sweet and endearing. It's refreshing, because I remeber back in the USA NO ONE would call me darling unless it was my best friends or my family or my husband.(Oh, or my charming girlfriend Renee Rudzinski. She was known to always call me darling.) But darling is very popular and everyone is calling you darling. Darling is not a word just limited to sweethearts. They call you darling at the reception desk to get your hair done, they call you darling at Tescos when you buy your cheese, they call you darling when you buy flowers from the man at the corner market, they call you darling when you go to TOP UP at the Tube Station. All the men in the UK call you darling!! And, the women do it too, but it's less common. Usually, it's the lower middle class or the working class that call you darling. But, I don't care. I don't discriminate with compliments and sweet words. I take my darling anywhere I can get it. (HA!)

A definiition of the Word DARLING:
dar⋅ling
  /ˈdɑrlɪŋ/ Show Spelled Pronunciation [dahr-ling]
–noun
1. a person very dear to another; one dearly loved.
2. (sometimes initial capital letter) an affectionate or familiar term of address.
3. a person or thing in great favor; a favorite: She was the darling of café society.
–adjective
4. very dear; dearly loved: my darling child.
5. favorite; cherished.
6. Informal. charming; cute; lovable: What a darling baby!
Origin:
bef. 900; ME derling, OE dēorling. See dear, -ling 1

Related forms:
dar⋅ling⋅ly, adverb
dar⋅ling⋅ness, noun

I like this, darlingness.. Have you ever heard of that?
His dear darlingness brought me my slippers and made me tea.

Monday 28 September 2009

PART 2: Dating in London: What's it Like to Date an English Man

My experience in dating in London is unique to me, of course, but perhaps there are other species of the more delicate gender who would agree with me on the courting rituals of the male beast. And, that thereof of the English man.

So, you want to know my opinion on dating an English bloke? Yes, you do, or you wouldn't be reading this blog. Well, first of all, what you see in the movies could be true of an English gentlemen. The Hugh Grants, the Colin Firths and who else? Those are fine examples that Hollywood shows you of an English gentlemen. But are those examples real? Is there a likeness, where Hollywood and fantasy meet reality and truth? Well, I love Colin Firth and his portrayal of Mark Darcy was sexy, sublime and true to the reality of an Englsh man or was it? Well, in a way it was and in a way it wasn't. My impression of the English men comes from my real life, what I have observed on the street, in the tea houses,in the pubs,in parliament (no, just kidding), in my true life experience. And, with my true archaelogist eye for seeeing through things and exacavating those hidden elements that make people in certain cultures click it's my desire and pleasure to share with you those impressions.

The English men are gentlemen to the extreme !!: courteous, thoughtful, well mannered, polite, and disarmingly charming. They are great models for the rest of the men in the world on sophistication and plain old fashioned good manners. They are always very dapper, well dressed and svelte. Yes, svelte ! Most drink a lot of beer, it's called the pub gene, but I have never seen one English man with a big belly. It's a mystery to me, because I don't see many gyms around London, not like in California anyway. English men wear elegant suits and seldom see a pouchy pouch.

Seriously, English men love to write. They are natural great and talented writers.Even their natural speech is quite eloquent and they have a great vernacular of elegant words at thier disposal. Being a words smith and poet myself, I just love it. I think it has to do with their upbringing and the school system requires them as young lads to write many essays. It's any wonder England has produced some of the world's greatest writers. I can attest to this because I am a lover of Literature and am particularily fond of English Literature. I love Shakespeare, Eliot, Hardy, Austen and Thackeray. I think England is a land of poets, so naturally the men are quite naturally poetic even if they write you a text message. If they have degrees from Oxford or Cambridge they are like this to a more intense degree. It's very romantic and quite refreshing.

So, once they start writing they may write you or let me correct myself, they will compose ( this is said in a POSH British accent) an email. Usually, it's no more than a simple concise 3-4 paragraphs. I don't have time to read 3 to 4 paragraphs from a man that I just met. The English men are quite long winded. They like to beat around the bush. It's all very romantic and lovely, for sure. But, this day in age, I have to bring home the bacon and sometimes fry it up in the pan. I don't have time to sift through a deluge of words from a man I just met and had one connection with. In their boyish charm they often forget that women just like a man to call them and ask them out on a date. It's very simple.

By this time all this attention is wonderful. It's quite good to be showered with so many compliments and the intrigue is building. But, don't buy into it. The next thing, is that they'll text you about 20 times. Telling you how much they love the moon when it's full and that it reminds them of you. Or, how they are wondering why you stopped emailing and texting them. And, that they dropped by the original place that you met in the hopes that they might run into you again because they really miss you. Then if they run into you at the local pub they have to drink 5 pints before they muster their courage to talk to you and ask you for your phone number again. Once, they start a rampage of texts it's endless. They'll practically conduct the whole courting rites and propose marriage to you via texts. The intrigue and sexual tension is building, meanwhile your hands are getting carpal tunnel from so much texting!!

The English men are quite reserved and are afraid of the initial intimacy. It's quite aggravating for me to conduce a relationship email/ text or otherwise, with a man I hardly know. If a man is not brave enough to just call me and ask me out for a drink or a lovely cup of tea, I don't want to have anything to do with him. As, the English say " I can't be bothered!" On the other hand, if the man is your boyfriend or someone your attracted to, then by all means, a bit of techo flirtation is de rigeur in this day and age, so indulge yourself!

And, if you really like the bloke, you can always consider going with the flow and just enjoying the unique qualities of your English man instead of fighting the flow. What is that saying patience is a virtue. As Eart Kitt sings in her song " An Englishman needs time". Well, you might have to be a bit patient with the way the English blokes are so shy and reserved, but it could also prove quite rewarding. Besides being reserved is quite beautiful thing.

Here is a video of Eartha Kitt Singing An Englishman Needs Time.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IRLHhVdcGl0"





Enjoy !
Note Bene: These blogs are meant in the spirit of good humor and love.
No offense meant. Hopefully, no offense taken. Hey if you can't laugh
at yourself you are going to shorten your life span. Duh!

Saturday 26 September 2009

Part 2: How to Save Money in London: To Top Up or Not to Top Up

Another way to save money is to buy a mobile phone and then buy TOP UP vouchers. Many Londoners don't have a regular phone plan that you pay a set bill every month. Instead they use the Top Up system and pay as you go. But, be sure to get a good plan. I am with Vodaphone, they will charge you just £20 a month with unlimited texts and 300 minutes of voice time. That's pretty reasonable. Before, I found out about this I was buying TOP UP vouchers and paying £5 every 2-3 days. It was aggravating because what if I needed to text someone and I ran out of Credit. I would have to go out in the middle of the night just to TOP UP. Also, it would equal about £50 a month. Often, I end up with more time left over for voice messages. You will need to Top Up, that in American terms means to add credit. The British are fabulous for topping up this and topping up that. The whole culture is based on a top up system including being able to top up your electricity bill as you go along. All this is taken place at your local Off License Store, which is equivalent in America as your local Liquor Store. They are usually open up until 10 or 11 pm. You top up your MOBILE, you top up your credit card, you top up your electric bill, you top up your Oyster Card and then when you go a party the host will ask you as she sees your champagne glass empty. She'll come up to you and say politely to you, " Would you like a top up? " At this point you just SMILE real big and say, " Certainly darling I would love a TOP UP , and thank you very much !! "

Cheers,
Sabrina

Next London Diaries

Dating in London Part 3

Tuesday 22 September 2009

Part 1: Dating in London: Where's my Mark Darcy?

Let's see, since I 've been in London I dated a man from Israel, Ireland, England, Scotland, India ( but was born in Kenya and raised in London, hence a definitely an English bloke likes rugby and drinking pints of Guiness), Pakistan, Italy, Spain,Iran, Egypt, and then of course one my paisano, American man. I don't think I can think of anyone else. They have all been just a one off one time thing. Only with the Italian was it a full fledge relationship thing.Anyway, so I definitely have my opinions of men from many different lands.

The United Kingdom men: English, Welsh, Irish, and Scottish men. English men since they are of Anglo Saxon ancestry most are very fair with blue eyes. Most are reserved,chivalrous,intelligent and polite. English men are gentlemen through and through and always want to do the right thing. Once in awhile you'll meet someone that's sexy in a Hugh Grant( althgouth I am not a big fan of Hugh Grant..and thought he was a wanker with Liz Hurley) bad boy kind of way, he'll be a mixture of gentleness, elegance and manliness that can be rather exciting and very sexy. Although, with English men are so afraid of intimacy that they'll probably propose marriage to you via text, and then wonder why you don't reply straight away. Oh, I forgot to mention he'll proably have to drink 5 pints of guiness because he 's so shy. The Scottish men since they are Celtic (like the Irish and Welsh)are much darker in appearance: darker hair,eyes and eyebrows (makes me think of the commercial for BRAWNY paper towels) and to me as a whole race of men are much sexier than their English brothers. (Sorry Hugh Grant, Colin Firth!)There the type of men that might sweep you away and take you in the bushes like a lumber jack. They are also more honest and direct than English men and don't mind hurting your feelings or making you feel a wee bit uncomfortable to get a message across. The positive of that quality is not wasting time, yours or thiers. That's a good thing. Their Scottish accent is quite charming they have lilt when they speak to you. Oh but the Irish men are the most charming of the UK men; very warm, and friendly. And their accent is the opitomy of charming. For example they will say " What kind of TINGS do you like to do in your spare time? We have dated TREE (three) times Miss Sabrina isn't time for a little kiss?? ( heehee). Come on just one kiiiis dahling.
Adorable.

Moving on to the Asian community: Pakistani and Indian men are quite protective, fun, generous, but are a bit rough around the edges. I dated an Indian man and although he was sweet, warm, very generous and a great kisser, he had a very abrupt and slightly aggressive side to him when he spoke to me. He also didn't like it that I said thank you for every time he did somethign nice for me. For example, he took me out for cocktails and appetisers in one restaurant and I said thank you. Then he took me out for dinner I said, " thank you" again. Then, we went out to the movies and had a blast at the end of the movie I said "thank you" again. I think he bought me a pair of gloves because my hands were freezing and I said, "thank you" again. He finally just said, " Sabrina, you only have to say thank you one time." I said, " Oh !" " I didn't know that!" I was raised to always say thank you no matter what. I didn't know someone would have a problem with me saying thank you too many times. I thought it was weird. But, it's a cultural difference. Also, in India I was told ( my friend Sami Kahn) that you don't need to say thank you or please very often because when you do it builds distance. You only say thank you and please with people you don't know very well or people you want to keep a healthy distance from. Weird man ! I had to break it off with the Indian bloke I decided he was just looking for a pretty thing that he can boss around and have chicken vindaloo ready for him when he comes home from work,as a Banker at Deutsche Bank.
( Boriiiiiiiiiiiing) I am yawning.

What else? Israeli men get the prize for most rude. They are very upfront. They don't say honey, sweetie, please, thank you. They tell you what's on thier mind without any regard to your feelings. They are combative, macho and aggressive. I think it has to do with growing up in a war zone and just surving in fighting for your life. Even the Israeli women say that Israeli men are rude. They are super good looking though: they have great skin, dark eyes and hair and are really tan and luscious in a midterranean sexy way. This one man I dated was perfect, except for his rudeness(well, that's a big thing) and his body odor !! When I brought it to his attention that he needed to put some deodarant on under his pits. He just replied, " You are sooooooo sensitive. I am from the Middle East and that the women back home love my manly smell!" I said, " Yeah but you smell like an onion "! Wait to you go to the US see if the chicks will dig your onion smell. We aren't in Israel anymore sweethaaaaaart !" No more Israelis !

Italians are very charming they make you feel great about yourself they shower you with gifts, compliments and adoration. They are also the most romantic of the whole male race. They send you dozens of romantic texts.They call you " amore mio !" That was my name when I was with my Italian bloke " Amore mio this and Amore mio that!" They will bring you presents everyday. Designer clothes just in your right size. Italian hand bags in real leather that smells like true cow hide. Gorgeous bottles of perfume. Classic books of Jane Austen, written inside the flap how much they adore you. But is it all sincere? It probably is sincere. But dont' expect them to be faithful it's not in their genes. Italian men are so sucesssful with women because they make you feel like you are the most gorgeous women in the world. They also do this with probably a half dozen women at the same time they do it to you. I question their sincerity, but on the other hand they could be sincere. I think they just love women, it's a cultural thing.

Another great thing about an Italian man is that they are very gentlemanly. They will carry your bags. Take you to your front door step.Make sure you get home safely. Make you chicken soup when you are sick.They will pay for everything and feel insulted if you offer to pay anything.If you are dating an Italian, buyer beware. He probably has a wife back in Italy with two children, a mistress in Poland that he's had for 2 or three years, and on top of that half a dozen other flirtations t that he's probably met online. In the meanwhile, he's telling you how much he adores you and he can't wait to introduce you to his Mom and his family. He can't wait for you to live with him back home in Italy and teach you Italian, the language of love. He's lying to you, he's lying to her, he's lying to himself. (Just roll your eyes and don't believe a word he says). Start making plans to leave your lover. Don't buy into their generosity and their charm. But, they make good friends those Italian men. They are naturally warm and endearing. The only thing is who wants to be friends with a bloody liar.On a positve note, if you can put up with their philandering you might come out a winner. You'll have a great wardrobe know more Italian and know how to cook Cannelloni and crush grapes with your bare feet.

I dated my paisano Americano in London. Before I came to London I never much fancied American men. I thought they were rough around the edges, unsophisticated, not well travelled. All these cliches that the whole world about Americans I also thougt the same thing too. I know it's a shame that I could think so poorly of my own people. Back home I also dated many sophisticated, well travelled and highly educated men. But, something inside me was turned off by American men. Perhaps, the grsass is always greener on the other side. Living in London has taught me to appreciate American men more. After dating men from about 10 different countries, I can finally assess honestly that American men are the most generous, kind, open, feminist, and straightforward. I dated an American man he always insited on walking on the outside of the street just in case someone splashed water on my hoop skirt ( heehe).He was very gentlemanly and always offered to carry my big satchel. On the other hand, when I told them that I had myriad of professions they rooted my multi talentedness and diversity instead of making me out as some circus freak that can't focus. They are also very generous to everyone: they tip the waitress and taxi drivers 20%, whether they are rich or not. I think American appreciate my ambition,assertiveness and straighforwardness. Where with alot of European men they are threatened by my strength, an American man can handle me and bring out my best. My Italian boyfriend told me one time he thought I was too masculine. I just told him he was too feminine and that he could not handle me. ( He also couldn't change a light bulb to save his life. When I asked him to change the light bulb it took him two months, then when he finally did he broke the light bulb and he broke the fuse.) Whateeevah! I also think American men are more spiritual, espcially Califo rnian men. Most men in the world American or not, are just not interested in spirituality. They don't get it in the way women are naturally talking about Star Signs and the supernatural. That's just men for you ! Some English men though,unless they are Buddhist or are from Glastonbury ( is a new age village known for it's hippies and new age airy fairies )don't understand a thing about spirituality; karma, or New Age philosophy, metaphysics. It's not that they are closed off to it, sometimes they are interested in it and ask me lots of questions. But, many thinks it's airy fairy to talk about this stuff. It's just not in the culture so don't even bother.

So ladies if you can accept some of what I mentioned about Englsh culture English culture and try and focus on the postive qualities of English men (immigrants: European/ Middle Eastern/ Asian men),you are going to have a really fun adventure and unforgettable time. And, stories definitely you can tell your grandchildren and your friends and family back home.

I can write a book dedicated to dating around the world, but this is just a glimpse of my vast experiences. These are my personal experiences with men in London that has made me a wiser woman. OK dolls this has been my own uique experiences now be brave date as many men as possible and get back to me ( lol!) Maybe, we can write a book together.. Huh? Anyone out there, want to co-write a book with me?

Note Bene: Some of these vignettes are gross generalizations and gross exagerrations, it's all meant in the spirit of humanistic humor and fun.
No offense is meant so no offense is taken.If you can't laugh at yourself, who can you laugh at?

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Part 2:Dating in London: What it's like to date an English man.

Saturday 19 September 2009

Part 2: Dating in London: What's it like to date an English man

My experience in dating in London is unique to me, of course, but perhaps there are other species of the more delicate gender who would agree with me on the courting rituals of the male beast. And, that thereof of the English man.

So, you want to know my opinion on dating an English bloke? Yes, you do, or you wouldn't be reading this blog. Well, first of all, what you see in the movies could be true of English gentlemen. The Hugh Grants, the Colin Firths and who else,mmm...who is that guy Beckham. Those are fine examples of English gentlemen. (Except for Hugh Grant, he was weird with his philandering with prostitutes when he had gorgeous Liz Hurley.. what's up with that Hugh?) Anyway, The English men are gentlemen to the extreme !!: courteous, thoughtful, well mannered, polite, and disarmingly charming. They are great models for the rest of the men in the world on sophistication and plain old fashioned good manners. They are always very dapper, well dressed and svelte. Yes, svelte ! They drink a lot of beer, but I have never seen one English man with a big belly. It's a mystery to me, because I don't see many gyms around London, not like in California anyway.

Seriously, English men love to write. They are natural great and talented writers.Even their natural speech is quite eloquent and they have a great vernacular of elegant words at thier disposal. Being a words smith and poet myself, I just love it. I think it has to do with their upbringing and the school system requires them as young lads to write many essays. It's any wonder England has produced some of the world's greatest writers. I can attest to this because I am a lover of Literature and am particularily fond of English Literature. I love Shakespeare, Eliot, Hardy, Austen and Thackeray. I think England is a land of poets, so naturally the men are quite naturally poetic even if they write you a text message. If they have degrees from Oxford or Cambridge they are like this to a more intense degree. It's very romantic and quite refreshing.

So, once they start writing they may write you or let me correct myself, they will compose ( this is said in a POSH British accent) an email. Usually, it's no more than a simple concise 3-4 paragraphs. I don't have time to read 3 to 4 paragraphs from a man that I just met. The English men are quite long winded. They like to beat around the bush. It's all very romantic and lovely, for sure. But, this day in age, I have to bring home the bacon and sometimes fry it up in the pan. I don't have time to sift through a deluge of words from a man I just met and had one connection with. In their boyish charm they often forget that women just like a man to call them and ask them out on a date. It's very simple.

By this time all this attention is wonderful. It's quite good to be showered with so many compliments and the intrigue is building. But, don't buy into it. The next thing, is that they'll text you about 20 times. Telling you how much they love the moon when it's full and that it reminds them of you. Or, how they are wondering why you stopped emailing and texting them. And, that they dropped by the original place that you met in the hopes that they might run into you again because they really miss you. Then if they run into you at the local pub they have to drink 5 pints before they muster their courage to talk to you and ask you for your phone number again. Once, they start a rampage of texts it's endless. They'll practically conduct the whole courting rites and propose marriage to you via texts. The intrigue and sexual tension is building, meanwhile your hands are getting carpal tunnel from so much texting!!

The English men are quite reserved and are afraid of the initial intimacy. It's quite aggravating for me to conduce a relationship email/ text or otherwise, with a man I hardly know. If a man is not brave enough to just call me and ask me out for a drink or a lovely cup of tea, I don't want to have anything to do with him. As, the English say " I can't be bothered!" On the other hand, if the man is your boyfriend or someone your attracted to then by all means a bit of techo flirtation I suppose de rigeur in this day and age so indulge yourself!

And, if you really like the bloke, you can always consider going with the flow and just enjoying the diversity. What is that saying patience is a virtue. As Eart Kitt sings in her song " An Englishman needs time". Well, you might have to be a bit patient with the way the English blokes are so shy and reserved, but it could also prove quite rewarding. Besides being reserved is quite beautiful thing.

Here is a video of Eartha Kitt Singing An Englishman Needs Time.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IRLHhVdcGl0"





Enjoy !
Note Bene: These blogs are meant in the spirit of good humor and love.
No offense meant. Hopefully, no offense taken. Hey if you can't laugh
at yourself you are going to shorten your life span. Duh!

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